Hmmph

Sailing, much like flying, is one of those things where one thing leads to another. A little mistake here, another goof there, and the next thing you know you have a crisis on your hands. In this case “in your hands.” It is that time of life, I guess, where stuff starts to break down, and one thing leads to another.

Yesterday was supposed to be just a little routine prostate biopsy at the urologist. The first sign, was when he claimed the little guy was of prodigious proportions (not his words). Next came the inability to pee immediately after the invasive procedure at the other portal of the waste control system. That didn’t alarm me as I have never gone down this road before. I didn’t know I should be alarmed. But a couple hours later when still not able to evacuate and having followed the instructions to be drinking lots of water the impression that something was wrong materialized.

First stop was urgent care. The only thing learned there was that they don’t have the same resources as other facilities connected to the same hospital complex. So they send me to the emergency room after an attempt to insert a catheter, but I need a narrower one, and they don’t have smaller. Only have to walk a block to the ER and start the intake process again.

First thing that happens there is doing an ultrasound of the bladder to determine that yes, indeed, there are 870cc in there. “I’ll bet you have to really pee.” No Piss, Purloin. I lost track of how many different sizes or attempts at getting a catheter in to my bladder they attempted over the next few hours, but the whole time the bladder would occasionally try to do it’s job. Morphine didn’t help, other pain killers didn’t seem to help. Essentially it was a titanic struggle between a furious bladder and a rogue prostate and in between was the hapless urethra.

Finally a urologist resident came to save the day with technology! He had a camera in a catheter that was “small,” only 16 mm. He couldn’t fool me, and he knew it. But the camera was the trick as he was able to finally get a catheter in. Instant relief. Eureka!

So the internet lords (aka .ummah) have created some 589 new domain names (besides the usual .com, .net, .edu, .gov, etc.) that will be available by the end of the year. Interesting that you will be able to get .islam for your new web site but they don’t offer a .christian domain name. There is .lds, .mormon and .wow! .christmas but that season is now about as Christian as Islam is (can you say .blackfriday? Yes! it’s there!). There is .church, but that’s a little vague. There’s no .judaism either, but .kosher. And of course there is .gay, .lgbt, .hiv, .porn, .sex, .wang, and finally .wtf (and no, that doesn’t stand for Wednesday-Thursday-Friday).

But Islam not only has .islam available, they have .ummah and .shia as well. Poor Sunnis. I guess you’re left out, too. There is .ist on the list as well, which is kind of weird. Maybe the true believers should have demanded .islamist.

I suppose the Internet ummahs figured that surely Christians must be able to more closely identify with at least one of the hundreds of new unique domain names. Perhaps they had .rip in mind. After a most thorough scan of the list I did find one that Christians should appropriate: .fish.